Egg Cramp

by White Plum

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about

The story of bird people who came from outer space to rescue Egg Cramp from her cage and retroactively change human beings into byrdies by inverting their time lines with a nightmare machine. Luckily one person was immune to the nightmare machine. Going by the name Thin Swamp Crusta Bitty, she invented tram cakes, which were highly addictive but also reversed the affects of the dreaded nightmare machine. Humanity was saved once again!

credits

released July 1, 2015

Leo Whitebird, acoustic guitar, bass, percussion, mandolin
Phil Belknap, swamp guitar and accordion
Johnny Ewald, percussion
Richard Knutson, guitars, bass, drums, keyboards, vocals
Rahina McWethy, voice on Ready For Going
Melanie Worthington, extra voices
Jumble Hole Clough by sample
Sunday Night IC by sample

all songs Richard Knutson & Leo Whitebird
© PFE Music 2015

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

Plum Flower Embroidery Bolton, UK

Included here are Plum Flower Embroidery, White Plum, Sunday Night IC, Beat The Dutch, Frappe Dreamgate & Flooding Opera.

I'm also involved with Churn Milk Joan, Neutral Sons and The Chacers which are elsewhere on Bandcamp.

Recordings cover 1980 to the present.

Plum Flower Embroidery is the solo projects of Richard Knutson.

PFE Music is the net label umbrella which shelters the collection.
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Track Name: Egg Cramp
ooo wow wow ooo wow wow ooo

I can't get the egg out
I can't get it out
I got a bird cramp
frightening
my little bird is ever so sore
can't get bigger and still fit through the door
giant ass trundle
giant ass bake
voracious conditioning you can't fake

I'm a God fearing spreader
can't disembowel
I can't get the egg out
foooking hell!

foook foook foook
foooking hell
Track Name: American Bob & The Orange Orbs
"What are those orange orbs? Hey Bob! What are those orange orbs in the sky?"

I was a stick, stick master
I of the stick, stick master, ahhhh
I was a stick, stick master
I of the stick, stick master
critical bright
stupid dick
see it go, stick to the map
critical bright, fire ball
somewhere south, critical bright

"see the orange orbs, hey Bob!!"

explain, exploitation and fire, stick master
get your kicks from me, root vegetables
rune testicles, root vegetables!
the real thing, the real thing (coda cola) that other one
I've been tiptoeing around this controversy since 1942
chunka chunka chunka chunka
I haven't had a classic star cola
since I had one with you

"Hey Bob!"

I am scraper man, I am scraper man
I am scraper man, ion scraper man
I am scraper man, I am scraper man
I'm afraidies in the kitchen
and I found these in the kitchen
file scraping, five gun mode
five gut mole the stationators
five gut Ben in the station

"Have you seen the orange orbs in the sky? What are they?"

where am I?
where are you?
here I am
it's something new
so gay, so insistent, so underground
ultra sweet, just like you, I'm upside down
ultra high, 12:30, 5:30, 9:00 AM
just like you, 9:15, 6:30, 4:00 PM
Track Name: Nightmare Machine
the owl believes he dines alone
he floats majestic not like a stone
watch them film birds of prey
I'm there for lunch, not much to say

though you are engaging and I like your voice
speaking nonsense fabulous
if you had more piercings and a hooded cloak
they might believe your little joke

the owl believes gorilla men
a black tie to strangle them
with the look of love
we are honour bound
whisper sweet nothings to grind them down

grind them, follow their words
they keep talking, having you on
tiny plans to gather like a nightmare machine

"Oh, it's the cat!"

fat and tame, fat and tame, fat and tame
tiny plans to gather
the out come is the same
watch the outcome is the same
they keep talking, having you on
tiny plans to capture like a nightmare tool
the outcome is the same
watch the outcome is the same
the puss he is fat and tame
tiny plans to gather like a nightmare machine
Track Name: New Pavement
I went straight, I had a nickel
an emergency, a cup of tea
any fungus, presently, a cup of tea

boyfriends are plastic
just like me
sending rude messages
that everyone can see
from my interest room
it looks interesting

7 seconds with the miller
see you later, I'm a killer
7 seconds I'm an error
with the miller I'm a writer
things are sharper, see you later
things are brighter, see you later

scored a goal, their own goal
their own goalie
you're hired
you're fired
you work for me

wetter weather, just a handshake
that makes it better
I went straight, I forgot her
I was always uptight
quit all that shit a long time ago

absolutely nothing for 6,000 miles
up to neck indefinitely
fishing in style
bet your life, take my wife
you are on trial
slept four times with the devil
I'd do anything...
Track Name: Moob Rip
ah, moon tripper you hit the stick
trick your ticker boom dipper stick
ah, mood ripper
concentric mind alternator
convivial space-age ghost tripper
addition feed
dystopian killer weed
horticultural horsey play
I'm sure you like it that way

steely grotto
monster heart
artlessness mercurial poulard

inner bird emotional
you're a moon tripper
forest try
get your kicker
get your kicker
boom dipper stick

she will be my rock and roll baby
and I don't mean maybe
baby baby baby
Track Name: Only The Pony
are you remembering?
are you remembering?
are you?

practice whole living eat your mind
I'm not that hungry maybe another time
you need covers the question begs
what will you do with no arms or legs?
all your comforts disappear
face your limits in the mirror
I hear you crying
I hear you pray
church on time
your very peach is mine

tippy tom tom
tippy tippy tom tom tom
Track Name: Flat Surfaces
I have lately discovered flat surfaces
I have lately discovered flat surfaces

mad dog runs the evidence curve
the inquisitive bride asks
"Has the caretaker died?"
with her clipboard tracks
leaving with the facts
I have lately discovered flat surfaces

she made pure lemonade
in a pink microwave
you are not a slave
you just a name
you are just a couch potato
and I'm very very very much the same

I have lately discovered flat surface
flat surfaces
the bohemian craze
in a bohemian daze
I was somewhat impressed
it was all out of phase

a curious delight
a curious bookend
a curious old friend
but we never had our end away
I ran off down the road in my socks and bare feet
Track Name: Piecing Together A Flycatcher With Tape
(instrumental)
Track Name: Free Kick
free kick

free kick

7 seconds with the miller
see you later
I'm a killer
I'm an error
I'm a writer
things are sharper
things are brighter
the roof of the sky is full of glitches
I can hear the sky
she pulls out the stitches

free kick

"ow ow ow"
Track Name: Thin Swamp Crusta Bitty
practice living today
keep the monkey brains at bay
empathy, feeling kind
practice whole living baby eat your mind
practice witchcraft and voodoo spells
lighting candles, ringing bells
practice in a church or in your garage
look at them shine!
look at them shine!

if it makes sense to the cat
naked all day in the flat
on the football pitch with Dick and Jane
listen to yourself try to explain
arms and legs fight in vain
you found the shuttlecock
you're insane
an ever growing body of make-believe
doctor drain
arbitrary socialised anatomy
I shouldn't complain
population evasiveness
conformity

invented tastes from far at sea
from far away remember me
remember to practice in your head
like all the Pharaohs did
at least that's what they claim
in the books and magazine
that I have subscriptions to
in greater Manchester
though I can't afford to renew

they just keep rendering me
they just keep remembering me
they just keep reminding me
I don't know what to say
they keep coming to the door
are you alright?
are you OK?

practice whole living eat your mind
I'm not that hungry
maybe another time
practice whole living eat your mind
I'm not that hungry
I'm not that hungry

I'm remembering
I'm remembering

thin swamp crusta bitty
Track Name: The Third Magnificent Hummingbird
I know every leaf
every winter green tree
I know your face
though you hide it from me

I know every canary is mean
every clever man has an aubergine
I know how you come apart
you seem very separated from the start

pitch bend
press rewind
unmanned spacecraft with no eyes
unaccustomed and unschooled
I could be you
I could be fooled
I could hold you in my hand
look at me
no never mind
unmanned spacecraft with no eyes
no eyes

here comes the third mandolin
what is Haydn hiding in?
Track Name: Birthday Boy Ginger Snaps
don't get me started
don't get me started
don't get me started
under starter
getting started
cooker table cooker table cooker table

don't get me started
don't get me started
don't get me started
on the ashes in Ohio
when a single bloody word makes all the difference
funky (all the difference)
funky funky (avocado)

oh aye, your naked mind
birthday? birthday?
it's your birthday
happy happy birthday
something for you!

don't get me started on the nature of death
it's like the toilet of your friendship
always flushing refugees
always flushing...
find your toothbrush
find your toothbrush
happy birthday
find your toothbrush
happy birthday
I'm digital...
the idea of the circle
the idea of the pickle
on the table
propaganda under ashes
in the cooker
in the pantry like potatoes

under water getting washed off
something sticky
but it comes back
it was truly something icky
Track Name: Screaming At The Byrds
I was driving in a car
I was screaming at the byrds
I was going pretty fast
I was slurring all the words

I was in the back of a van
I was filling in receipts
and dipping in again
there were claws where there were feets

I was painting pretty faces
but I only had blue
I wanted to see the Chacers
I wanted a picture of you
I thought you were MJ
I thought you were something too

I was driving in a car
I was screaming at the byrds
I was going pretty fast
I was slurring all the words

I was painting pretty faces
I only had blue
I wanted to see the Chacers
I wanted a picture of you
I thought you were MJ
thought you were something too
I thought you were something
I thought you were something too
Track Name: Tram Cake
gotta get a tan like a Moroccan
gotta get some tram before I'm walking here
tram cake well never you mind
I'm a thirsty bird I never do fly
grounded a minor setback
a minor delay
hey hey hey tram cake

running running with fear
if I could get out of here
I could get on that boat
everything would be better my dear

dear John, read my letter
read my book, I haven't wrote it yet
what's the time? what's the time?
"It's about 7:30"

well I'm overcome
well I'm over done
out of the oven and into the sun
tram cake love to try some
tram cake

we don't got none
none of that here
but I come from over there
I come from over there!

tram cake!
Track Name: Sand Or Sandy
where do you sign?
how do you sign?
what is your sign?
you're one of mine

a girl in a boat
why so remote?
why do you vote?
sell me a coat

the fragrance is sweet
you still got two feet

where do you park?
where do you start?
how do you get from the bottom to the top?
do you like colour?
yes, I like colour
and shapes?
do you like shapes?
do you like colour?
do you like shapes?
do you like colour?
when you meet people
most of time it's exactly the same
just like the time before
but say, just on the off chance
something different happens
phasing
phasing
phasing...

have you noticed it?